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Today I will Drop my illusions

There was a time in my life, when I would have told you with certainty that my husband did not love me. I would have told you that he was not capable of love. I would have told you that my situation was hopeless because I could not stop loving someone who did not appear to love me.
 
This was an illusion. It was never true. It was me who felt unable to love. It was me who felt that I could not be loved. It was only as I worked my DBT skills that I started to realize that this was a lie. It was a judgment, a story that had become my reality.

Ask Katie....

I can't give mental health advice online, but I can certainly begin a dialogue with you about the problems you are having in your life. I would like to invite all those who visit my site to leave a question if they have one.
 
Maybe you just want to know what kind of counseling I do? Or maybe you aren't sure that your problem fits my practice? Feel free to leave a question. Your questions are directed to my e mail so I will recieve them in a timely manner.

Another's love is not about you.

Sunset in Grand Marais Minnesota. This is what peace looks like to me!
 
If someone loves you, it is about them. If someone hates you, it is about them. It's so tempting to believe that the love or admiration of others somehow defines who we really are in the world. We may believe that the love or affection of others makes us smart, beautiful and important.
 
Imagine all the time and energy we have put into impressing others so that we can feel loved or important. Imagine instead what would happen if we re-directed that energy to building a better life and focused instead on meeting our intensions?
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